Desiring Children Part 1



Read Genesis 16, and Genesis 18:1-15

The desire for children is something many struggle with. Some struggle to get pregnant, some struggle with the loss of pregnancies, and some struggle with the lack of control over having children. These are not new difficulties but have been the struggles of many women dating all the way back to Biblical times. While I personally never struggled with getting pregnant, I wrestled with the desire for and the loss of children. I know the constant anxiety of wondering if each month was the one I'd get pregnant in; many times, I cried out to God to let me have a child to hold and keep. Nine times I prayed that God would let each child live. Nine times I was denied, and my child was called to our heavenly home.

The desire for children is something most people eventually feel at some point but most take for granted that it will all go as they expect. We simply don't think of all that can go wrong, until it does. You're not alone in your struggles, the Bible has several examples of people who desired children and how they each dealt with that struggle. Not surprisingly, most people dealt with it in the wrong way. Despite God promising Sarah a child, she laughed and took matters into her own hands. She doubted God, tried to force her own will, and didn't turn to the one and only giver of life. Abraham, however, entrusted his child to God. He trusted God would fulfill His promises. Hannah took the right approach when dealing with barrenness. There are others, but I'd like to take a look at these three.

I have learned a lot on my journey, but grief has many stages. We're not always ready or open to hearing some truths. Be patient with yourself and if you're not ready to hear something, that's ok. Store it in your mind so that when you are ready, you'll have those truths to fall back on.

If we look at Sarah and Abraham, we can see that they were uniquely blessed. God promised them a child. The Creator of life told them He would give them a son. In Genesis 12, God told Abram, "I will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you." Again, in Genesis 13:15-16, God told Abram, "All the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring forever. I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust of the earth, then your offspring could be counted." And yet again, despite Abram's doubting questions, God said, "'Look up at the heavens and count the stars - if indeed you can count them.' Then He said to him, 'So shall your offspring be.'" (Genesis 15:5). Despite all this, Sarah still doubted God's Word and didn't trust God would give her a child. In Genesis 16, Sarah took matters into her own hands and gave her maidservant to her husband, thinking she would have a child through her maidservant. Her doubt caused her to make a decision she would regret. This decision brought her strife because she tried to force God's hand. Not only was there a rift between Sarah and her maidservant, but now there was friction with her husband, as she blamed him for her own decision. (Genesis16:5). Sarah's lack of trust in God was so deep she even laughed when "The LORD said, 'I will surely return to you about this time next year and Sarah your wife will have a son.'" It's obvious that Sarah craved motherhood but instead of trusting God, she made bad decisions and scoffed at God's plan for her and Abram. It's very easy for us to doubt and be like Sarah. Although we may not be blessed with knowing God's plan for our families, we can rest in the knowledge that God has a plan for us.

The Bible tells us we are to be fruitful and multiply, so seeking to have a child is not wrong; however, when things don't go our own way, we still must trust that God knows best. His plan for you is better than you can possibly imagine. He works all things with a view to salvation. As Paul says in Romans 8:18, "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." So, when you find yourself desiring a child, rest knowing that even if that's not God's plan for you, He has something far better in mind.

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